Written by Rio Denali
An Old Man and an Old Woman were going down the road.  He was driving; she was leaning against the passenger door, looking out the window at the world going by.  Her mind wandered back to the beginning of their relationship, and how much things have changed.  "He is so different now," she thinks to herself,  and she can't help but feel angry with her husband.


"You know," she said, "we used to drive down the road snuggled up close.  Now you are way over there, and I am way over here -- with miles in between us.  I miss the old days when you were so romantic.  What happened to us?"


The Old Man drives along, listening to his wife and thinking about what she said. After a moment, he turns to her, "Honey... I never moved."




How we frame an event greatly influences our response and feelings about it.


Somewhere in my early 20's while I was a newlywed in a marriage that no longer exists, I had the benefit of an older, wiser friend.  She was in her early 30's at the time.  After suffering a marriage that nightmares are made of, followed by a horrendous divorce -- my friend had gone on to marry the man of her dreams.   


One day, while visiting her home, I stopped to admire a new desk lamp.  Gushing with romantic stars in her eyes, she told me that it was a birthday gift from her husband.  I had never seen her so happy, and having witnessed the abuse her ex-husband had put her through -- I was thrilled for her.  But, at the same time, I found myself twinging with a bit of jealousy.  We talked in the frank way that long-time friends do, and I found myself complaining that my husband--who couldn't name my birthday if his life depended on it--would never do something so thoughtful for me.


Seeing my distress and utter depression, "I think I need to explain," she said.  It turns out that her husband (an Army guy) was deployed during her birthday.  She had seen the lamp in a store, and when she mentioned it to him on the telephone he told her to go back and buy it.


Doesn't sound quite as romantic when put that way, does it?  But, to her--it was the most romantic gift in the world.


Instead of complaining that her husband "was gone on her birthday - again", or "didn't buy her a gift on his own", she looked at that lamp as a gesture of his complete love and devotion.  The lamp represented the man she loved so deeply, wanting to fulfill her every wish -- to give her everything she wanted -- and if she wanted that lamp then he was going to make sure she got it whether he could "give" it to her in person or not.  The lamp that she physically bought herself, to her, was the most romantic gift he could have given.


Looking back, she gave me some of the best marital advice I have ever heard:  "We can all find fault with our spouse.  A good marriage comes from recognizing the loving gestures."


It is easy to dwell on the negative while "keeping score".  But, focusing only on the bad will skew your outlook.  Take time to recognize the many ways your spouse shows you that they love you.  Does he take out the trash before leaving for work so that you won't have to do it?  Did she pick up your favorite brand of ice cream at the store?   Did he fill the gas tank so you wouldn't have to stand out in the cold?  Did she save you some hot water so you could shower in comfort?


Grand gestures are great for Hollywood.  But, it is the little day-to-day gestures that make up the happiness of a real marriage.

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Really listen. Most people spend much of a conversation formulating what they are going to say next... If you are doing that, you are not paying attention to what she is saying.

Also, don't fall into the trap of being so eager to tell her things about yourself, that you make the conversation a showcase of your accomplishments. Nothing makes a woman feel appreciated like a man genuinely wanting to learn about her, especially her thoughts and feelings.
Create fantasies together.

If she dreams of living on the beach, create that daydream together.

Paint her a verbal picture of what it would be like to be walking on a deserted beach together at night, with the light of the moon reflecting off the waves. Describe standing in the sand with the waves gently lapping at your feet, taking her hands in your own and drawing her up-turned face in for a kiss....

Find out what her daydream is, and make it one you share together.





3. Play out her dreams. 
Has she always dreamed of a taking Salsa lessons? Make arrangements and do it together.

Has she always dreamed of owning a BMW? Arrange to rent one for the day.

Has she always dreamed of visiting Paris? Set your apartment to be Paris for the night--French music, French food, French wine....a poster of the Eiffel Tower in the background, and a black and white table cloth on the candlelit table.... after dinner watch a black and white French film, then feed her French pasteries by hand for a late night dessert...





Did she mention a favorite band from her teenage years? Find out where they will be in concert, and book a weekend trip. Or surprise her with reservations to the newest restaurant in town. Or tell her she has the most beautiful legs you have ever seen and take her shopping for a new pair of high heels...


If she has something in mind for your date, be willing to try it. But, do not leave date planning up to her. There is nothing worse than being on a date with a man and having the following conversation, "Where do you want to eat dinner?" "I don't know, where do you want to eat?" "I don't know, do you have any ideas?" That is not sexy.
Be complimentary. Tell her how much you adore her, what things you love most about her (ie, her sparkling eyes and the wonderful sound of her laughter).... make her feel like she is the only woman in the room. Never look at other women in her presence.  Be passionate about her. Don't be afraid to tell her that she takes your breath away.

Is she being quiet? (Perhaps she is nervous or you are dominating the conversation?) Is she hinting about future dates? (Things are going well.) Is she touching your arm during dinner or do her fingers keep returning to her hair subconsciously? (You might want to look for a romantic spot for a kiss in this case?) Be aware of the cues she is offering. Follow her lead.

A final thought: it is important to remember that a woman will touch you how she likes to be touched. If she is very gentle and tentative with you, use the same gentle touch with her--it is not the time to pull her in for a passionate kiss.




Do not underestimate the sexiness of feeding a woman a decadent desert spoonful by spoonful, eyes locked on hers.

Do not underestimate the power of softly whispering, "You are so beautiful" in her ear as you embrace.

 Do not underestimate the power of lightly cupping her face in your hands as you reach in for a gentle kiss.

For a woman, an isolated movement of the softest, most gentle nature, can be the most romantic, and the most unforgettable....


It sounds counter-intuitive, but it is true. It is important to make her realize how much she misses you, and that she wants you around. She needs to realize that you have a life of your own and although you adore her, your life does not revolve around her.

Do not overplay this move or it will backfire. The point is not to help her realize she can live without you.... (too much absence and she might realize she doesn't need you after all.)  And, never make her feel like you are playing a game with her heart, or are doing this on purpose.  If she suspects you are doing this on purpose, you will erode all trust she has for you.

This rule is the most important of all. Be a man of strength and character. While indulging a woman is seductive, bending to her every whim is not. Sometimes a woman seeing you are willing to leave can make her respect you more as a man.



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Some of you may have noticed my recent absence.  Let's just say that I was re-structuring my life. 


I was an addict.  Yes, it's true....I became addicted to Twitter and Blogspot.  Had to detox.


I have been maintaining 9 websites and multiple Twitter accounts--plus freelancing articles on the side....and to my utter amazement, I began finding a quick measure of success.  (Do I sound surprised?)


With each new mark of success came an added focus on my part, a driving need to improve my offerings and not disappoint readers.  I found myself obsessing about articles, the websites, about adding fresh content daily, and I began checking website stats almost hourly analyzing the data for trends.  It became a full-time obsession.  And, if you think that was bad.....well, I won't even tell you about my Twitter habit... Twitter was my porn.


Most brilliant people are affected by a touch of craziness, certainly all creative people are.  Think of Van Gogh's ear, your high school art teacher, or Einstein (have you seen his hair??)   Craziness: It is the plague of creative minds.


For me, the crazies take the form of hyper-focused attention (otherwise known as obsession).  I could be Monk's younger, blonder, less-Lebanese sister...  Some may call it OCD, but I have always called it straight A's... thank you very much.  [For those of you who don't know, Monk references an excellent, but unfortunately now canceled TV show on USA channel, starring Tony Shaloub.]


Perfectionism:  my longtime arch enemy and often my greatest benefactor.  I wanted to put out a great product for you, the reader..... but perfection in all areas is simply not realistic.  Faced with finite resources, limited time to get things done and only so much energy:  life is a balancing act.  Using a disproportionate amount of resources in any one area, steals them from another.  My cyber hyper-focus robbed other areas of my life, and it was time to make things right again.  I have written on this topic before, see When is "Good" Enough? (The 80% Solution).


My kids were getting unruly, my husband needy, and my ass started expanding -- yep, I had to do something drastic.  So, I quit cold-turkey.  Stopped checking stats.  Stopped everything.  (Well ok, I did do a little Twittering....)


I started spending more time reading to my kids, snuggling with my husband on the couch, and cooking family dinners from scratch.  I started baking again.  Dinners became more leisurely; life more relaxed.  I started spending more time at the gym and reading the dusty novels that were hibernating on my bookshelf.  After about a month the difference was amazing.  I became a new person, but more important were the differences in my marriage and with my kids.  Our entire family was happier.  And I was reminded that this is what life is about...


Now that my world is back in alignment you will be seeing my by-lines once again.  But, probably not as often as before.  As wise man once said, "Everything in moderation."

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Four year old Paige Bennethum was heartbroken when her father was deployed overseas, so much so that she could not let go of his hand even as he stood in final formation before shipping out to Iraq.

As reported on NBC News out of Philadelphia, neither her father, Army Reservist Staff Sgt. Brett Bennethum, nor his commanding officer, had the heart to make her let go.

Let us be ever mindful of the young heroes, the military children, and the sacrifices they are forced to make.

 


The excerpt from the letter begins here:




Well, that is the excerpt of the letter...  It is just a bit of insight into what it was like living overseas.  Yes, it was fun to sample the best of Europe, and travel a bit.  But what I really took home was a new way of looking at the world...




 

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Written by Rio Denali

Isn't it interesting that we are universally offended to be judged by our race, gender, nationality, and ethnic background, but we welcome being judged by our birth date?


If I wrote here that all people of X race are impulsive, quick-tempered, passionate, and vengeful--I would violate every social and political rule that exists.


Now, replace X race with Scorpios, and my judgments are welcomed in polite society, even enjoyed and sought after for entertainment or guidance. Why is a judgment based on a birthday considered wisdom, rather than discrimination or prejudice?


I am not commenting on the accuracy or inaccuracy of Astrology, only that it is ironic that in our society where pre-conceived judgments about a person are taboo, a practice of marking a person based on the day they were born is socially acceptable.


Don't like my observation? It's probably because I am a Scorpio....we are confrontational you know.

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A while ago, I wrote an article, Why do People Cheat?, chronicling the affairs of two of my best friends.  Both led charmed lives with a handsome husband who adored them, a great sex life, financial security, adorable children...  And, both said they still loved their spouse.   They risked it all to have purely recreational affairs--fun and games with no emotional component.  Neither were in love with the "other man" and told me that even if they were single they would never consider a serious relationship with him.


But, what happens when there is more to it?  What happens when you meet the person of your dreams, but are already married to someone else?


Two of my closest male friends have faced this recently.


After 6 years of marriage, Dennis* is not happy and realizes that unless he leaves his wife, he may never be.  Chalk it up to irreconcilable differences (he wants children but his wife refuses) or perhaps growing apart (they are no longer connecting on many levels), either way his marriage is dying a slow death.  


I think it's naively romantic to imagine there is only one happy ending possible, or that there is only one "right" person for each of us.  The potential number of good matches is very small, but in the course of our lifetime we will meet a few of them--that perfect moment when the planets collide and two people connect on levels that take their breath away.




For Dennis, there was only one answer.  After a whirlwind week of constant conversation and dreaming of nothing but her....he did the "right" thing and broke it off completely.  He said it wasn't fair to the woman of his dreams, nor his wife.  Although his marriage probably couldn't be repaired, he could not morally close the door until the last effort had been exhausted.


There is a natural process that happens when a relationship ends, and the longer the history between the two people, the longer the process can take.  Relationships take time to grow; they also take time to die.  And until the final exhale, and you are done grieving, you remain entangled in the past.


My friend Doug's* story went a different path.  He maintained the affair for some time, eventually making plans to leave his wife.  He could not resist the siren's call of new love.  In the end though....things did not go as he planned.  After he came clean with his spouse, they decided to make a last-ditch effort to work out their problems and salvage the marriage.


In both cases, the men were left feeling emotionally vulnerable and raw.  The "other" women went through a dark and painful journey, and were ultimately left alone by the men they loved.  And, Doug's wife was emotionally devastated when she learned her husband had fallen in love with another woman.


Can either marriage be salvaged?  I doubt it, but they have to try.


In the 80's I saw a movie called "War Games", where a game-playing robot was created to guard/use the "launch" button on the United States' nuclear arsenal in case of human incapacitation.  Of course, something went wrong and it seized control during a training event....almost creating a nuclear war.  (Classic robot-taking-over type of flick so prevalent back then....)


What I remember the most about the movie was the final scene.  Just as the robot went to launch missile attacks, the hero engaged the robot in war gaming--having it play out all of the possible end scenarios.  As the robot processed through the strategies and probable outcomes, it realized this was a game that no one could win.


Affairs are much the same way, particularly ones that encompass the heart.  Eventually the relationship will progress to a level high enough to require a commitment.  (Very few people have the fortitude or patience to remain the "other" man or woman forever, and few married people can sustain long term affairs successfully.)


At that point, a choice will have to be made.  Someone will get hurt.  Often, everyone will get hurt.


The simplistic solution remains to avoid the situation entirely. But generally-speaking, this is not possible.  One cannot avoid the world.  There will be temptations, and most likely at some point there will be a cosmic moment.  You may take Dennis' approach  -- or Doug's -- but the decision you make will define the rest of your life.


*name changed to protect identity, of course

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My father raised me to be proud of my German heritage.  Like many Americans, our family did not have extensive detailed genealogical information (until recently), and my father had always believed his side of the family to be almost completely German.  He knew his grandfather had immigrated through Ellis Island from Germany in the early 1900's, and he had always assumed that the rest of the family was fully German as well.


When I moved to Germany, I expected to see people who looked exactly like me.  I had a German last name and growing up in Ohio, I had always been told--repeatedly been told--that I looked German.  But, it turns out that the American stereotype of Germans is wrong; they are not a homogeneous race of tall, muscular people with blue-eyes and blond hair. 


A few months after arriving in Germany, while sharing a bottle of wine with some new German friends, the topic came up.  When I mentioned being told I looked German while growing up, they all started laughing.  Honestly I felt a little offended.  I had always been taught to be proud of my German heritage, and here were Germans laughing at the idea of me being one of them.  To them, the idea that anyone would think I was German was hilarious.  They all agreed--I looked Swedish.  I explained that I didn't have a drop of Swedish blood, but it did little to convince them.  They all swore I was a Swede, NOT a German.


A decade later when I researched my genealogy in depth, I was surprised to find they were right.  Although I do have some family from Germany (the great-grandfather I mentioned earlier)... much of my lineage comes from the Vikings who settled in Sweden, Norway, and The Netherlands. 


My ancestors were the fierce, nomadic warriors who conquered and populated much of northern Europe.  Depending on which generation you look at, they inhabited much of the region; from Iceland to as far east as the Ukraine, conquering into parts of modern-day Germany, and taking the Normandy region of France by force.  (Normandy was so named because of the "North Men" who had invaded/conquered the region.)


As was common in the day, my Viking ancestors inter-married into the royalty of these new territories (usually by force), and thus my family line merges into the royal lines of Europe.  As royalty intermarried within themselves to keep all marriages of royal blood, my bloodline traces back to the palaces of almost every European country. (Arranged marriages were the norm, children were promised in marriage as peace offerings between kingdoms.)  Once I found a link into recorded history, it was easy to trace my ancestry.  Royal family records are highly detailed, and most survive to this day. 


I was amazed to find that if I followed the family tree back far enough, my ancestors came from almost every country in Europe.  Instead of being just German... I could claim heritage from at least 18 European nations.  The majority of my family was from northern Europe, but there was also a princess from Barcelona, several princes from Italy.  While living in Europe I visited the Castle of Salzburg, Austria--imagine my surprise when I learned that my ancestors used to live in that same castle.  My family line even directly ties to the British monarchies of both former years and of today.  Going back a bit further, Charlemagne makes his appearance several times in my family tree due to intermarriage, and I can trace the family all the way to Constantinople (modern-day Istanbul, Turkey)....something I had never imagined possible.

I also found it interesting that along the way many of my female ancestors were listed only as "Concubine" to the King.  Infidelity was expected and the children from those liaisons were often recognized by the royal fathers.


Genetics is a funny thing.... Sometimes one set of genes stands out more than the others.  Out of my parents and grandparents--I most resemble my father's mother, the woman who brings the Viking bloodline to my family tree.  Recently I came across this photo of Anita Ekberg, a Swedish actress and I was stunned.  She could be my sister.  It is funny how right those German friends were:  apparently I look Swedish after all.




Interested in tracing your family tree too?


FamilySearch.org  is a great place to get started, with an ever-expanding list of records from around the world.  All searches are free.


RootsWeb.com and Ancestory.com are two more great resources.


Cyndi's List contains a list of genealogy sites, broken down by region.


And, don't forget the value of Google.  From finding information about historical figures, to finding genealogy resources, through Google the world is at your fingertips.  Good luck!

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Written by Rio Denali

I have two close friends who professed to have it all: A husband they were madly in love with, a great sex life, owned a lovely home, adorable children, were financially secure, had a great reputation ….then they risked it all by cheating. Neither understood why they were doing it.


Both said the other man was “less than” their husband. In both cases, the other man was not as attractive as their husband — and he was not the sort of man either would ever want to marry. (Both said even if they were single, they would not end up with the other man—he was exclusively a fling.)


Neither of these women would ever consider leaving their husbands for the other man. They were not “in love” with these men in the traditional sense.


So, I have to ask myself why?




It’s not only women doing it. We see it everyday on the news—some politician caught up in a scandal. Sex in an airport bathroom, high-priced call girls, a lover in another country. A revolving parade of scandal and deception. These men are throwing away their family and career for an affair. Christie Brinkley is arguably one of the most beautiful women in the world. Her husband had an affair too. It would seem no one is immune.


What makes people cheat? Why risk a lifetime of accomplishment—career, family, prestige--for something that is not intended to be permanent?


My husband theorizes that people build lives they are ill-equipped to handle. We may love being a parent, and a spouse, and a homeowner, but many of us inwardly collapse under the constant pressure and responsibilities. Maintaining a household, children, and a family as well as a marriage takes a lot of work. Add the pressure of day-to-day life—laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, cooking and cleaning. And, the other chores--keeping up the yard, changing the oil in the car, giving the dog a bath--plus a career… and well... life gets full fast. The person we once were gets away from us. One day we wake up with a pile of laundry and a yard full of dog shit and wonder, “How the hell did I get here?”


With no time for ourselves, and little for our marriage, we begin to dream of an escape—a moment just for us, just for ourselves, where we are not “mommy” or “daddy”, but a vibrant, autonomous, sensual person once again….if even for a moment or only an afternoon. And, when opportunity knocks, sometimes it is more than we can do to say, “No.”


We cheat because the other person gives us what we do not get at home; the opportunity to be ourselves with no strings attached. It isn’t an affair of the heart, it is an affair with one’s self. It is an affair where we are the person we long to be, and we can forget about the leaking roof, or the nagging spouse, or all of the other things on our mind….and laugh. Carefree, if only for the moment, we can indulge in the simple pleasures of life; feeling close to another human being, physical intimacy, the pleasure of another’s attention. We escape the reality of the life we have constructed for ourselves, and can be anyone we want—funny, vivacious, flirtatious, erotic… And, that is what is hard to say “no” to.

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Marie* is wildly successful.  She was a pioneer in the ever-popular homemaking-website industry, creating her first website back before there were any others--and initially writing all of her own articles.  Now 10 years later, she runs a mini-empire, with 10 websites, a subscription service, paid advertisers and a small army of writers submitting articles to her for syndication.  Even still, she does much of her own writing yet today, and the articles she authors still  remain some of the most popular on her websites.
 
However, when I met her, she didn't tell me all of that.  Marie is charming and personable--and definitely a consummate professional.  Instantly likable and a true people-person, she is one of the best professional networkers I have ever met.  But when we met, Marie left out some very important parts of her resume...she only told me she was a small business owner.  As we talked more, she told me a bit about the success of  her websites.  Talking in depth over the next few weeks, we covered many aspects of the business, and Marie described herself and her work many ways but never once did she claim the title of "writer" or "author".  In fact, it was about a month into our friendship before I realized she did any writing at all.


Marie has been featured on HGTV and  in Parenting Magazine--and has been reprinted by many other nationally recognizable names; the stuff of any author's dreams.  She has even co-authored a book you may have seen in a bookstore.  Yet Marie did not consider herself a writer.


Being a person who tends to think in psychological terms, I found this most peculiar.  I have met many self-promoters who make their accomplishments out to be more than reality, but I have not met many people good at networking, who do not accept full credit for their accomplishments and promote them with gusto.


When I pointed this out to Marie, the woman who uses words for a living, sat speechless.

"But I am not actually a writer."


"Haven't you made money from writing?"


"Yes."


"In fact, isn't that how you have been supporting your family?"


"Yes, of course."


"And, this has been your sole occupation for the last decade, right?"


"Yes."


"At what point do you get to claim the title of writer?  You do it full-time, make an income from it, and are considered a professional in your field.  Everyone else considers you a writer.  You have already had more success in your writing career than most writers ever do...what will it take for you to consider yourself one?"

 




Or the woman who sits up at night writing the great American novel--at what point does she get to wear the title "writer" proudly?  Is it once she finishes that first novel?  Cashes the first check?  Or is the act of writing itself, performed regularly--even if no one ever reads a word--enough to justify the using the title with pride?


As we discussed this subject, Marie told me about a business seminar she had attended the month before, about being most impressed by a woman who introduced herself as an author.  From the way she carried herself, Marie assumed this woman had published many books.  It was only after talking for a period of time, that Marie realized this woman had never been published at all....in fact, she was still working on her very first novel, yet the woman wore the title of writer with the pride that only comes from a true sense of accomplishment.


Marie said that the irony was not lost on her at the time:  that she, the professional published author, was introducing herself as a small-business owner, while the woman who had not yet finished her first work introduced herself as a writer.  But, even that bit of irony did not push Marie to make the self-concept leap toward adopting the title of "author".


Many labels are an arbitrary thing we assign ourselves.  Someone who writes in her spare time may consider herself an writer, while a paid professional may not.
When not officially bestowed through ceremony or circumstance, a title is often something that we "are" internally and (sometimes but not always) wear externally for the world to see.  It is the sometimes public and always personal definition of a part of our self.  The moment of the first brush stroke, and the moment a person begins thinking of themselves as an artist are two separate events...at some point a mental leap is made, and the title is incorporated into the psyche; a shift in self-perception is made.


Often natural triggers help us make this leap.  Once a person begins spending a significant amount of time in the pursuit of their craft, or once they begin making a certain income from it (particularly if it allows them to "quit their day job") that is when the shift in self image is usually triggered.  But, there are cases where the changes happen so slowly, over a period of years, that there is no natural definitive shift point. 


If you are a stay-at-home mom who begins making a little money from a hobby.... and if success is a slowly built thing, taking place over a number of years instead of all at once... at what point do you consider yourself a professional in your field?  Take my friend for example, at what point did she become a "writer"?  It is hard to pinpoint an exact date, but I think it is safe to agree that she is there now.


Unofficial Experimental Research


They say the recipe for success in the workplace comes down to this:  identify the position you want and dress for it; act like you already have it; carry yourself in a manner befitting the job.


That advice fits in perfectly with the ever-popular Law of Attraction, which states that:

" people's thoughts (both conscious and unconscious) dictate the reality of their lives, whether or not they're aware of it." -Wikipedia

So, why did my friend, who is so grounded in reality in every other way, fail to see what no one else missed?   Secretly I suspect it stems from low self-esteem.  Despite her incredible accomplishments, she did not feel as though she measured up to the accomplishments of others.


Toward the end of our conversation, I challenged Marie to an experiment:  Introduce herself as an author 10 times over the next month. 


Even I could see the difference.  There was something about declaring herself an author to others that finally allowed Marie to incorporate it into her own self-image.  Her new-found confidence was good for her writing and her business, bringing greater web-traffic and ultimately greater ad revenue.   Absorbing the title into her self identity gave her the professional boost she needed to take her business to the next level.




We have all been told not to label our children and not to accept labels put on us by others.  We have been told that labels damage us psychologically, they limit our growth and inhibit our creativity.  However, I would also say that not accepting a label you have earned can be equally as limiting.  I am not a dedicated follower of the Law of Attraction, but there does seem to be something to it; accepting a positive label inwardly, and projecting it outwardly can attract success.


Looking in from the outside, it is easy to see the change that Marie's self-granted title made; the difference in her career when she claimed credit for her success was a pleasure to watch.  I wonder how many of us are doing the same thing?  Take a moment to ponder this question for yourself:  Do you have any missing titles that could make a difference in your life?  Might be worth a closer look.


*Marie's name was changed to protect her identity.

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Fun-loving, family-oriented folks with a relaxed view on life. Bubbly and effervescent, they value social relationships. Don't be surprised to find them outdoors, whether walking, fishing, hunting, or playing frisbee in the park--Golden Retriever owners like an active lifestyle.  


Commonly they are drawn to water.


Usually civic-minded, often environmentally conscience, and generally voters, these light-hearted dog owners have a responsible side. Of all breed owners, they are the most likely to volunteer their time or donate to charity. They are generous with their time and spirit.






Self confident with a carefree nature, these are people who love to laugh.







Poodle Owners

Poodle owners appreciate the finer things in life.  They are generally older, and often fastidious and detail-oriented.


Poodle owners like to travel.  They have appreciation for other cultures and many endeavor to learn a second language.


Out of the breeds we profile here, poodle owners are the most likely to be accused of arrogance and snobbery.



Don't be surprised to find Perrier or fine wines in their fridge.

They enjoy frequenting art museums, and have an affinity for classic cars.










The propensity for baby-talk will give them away.


Relationships for them are all consuming and cuddling on the couch is heaven.

These owners enjoy fashion, and frequent the best hair salons.  With regular manicures and pedicures, they always have a polished appearance.  Shoe shopping is a popular pastime, and their hand-bag collection is quite impressive too.  They put extensive thought into color choices in the home, fashion or elsewhere.




They eat in trendy restaurants, don't wear white after Labor-Day, and are loving in nature.











German Shepherd Owners

Highly disciplined in nature with a penchant for precision--German Shepherd owners find comfort in an orderly life. They are the rule-followers.


German Shepherd owners have an understated appearance, often exuding a quiet strength.  The men have short hair; the women likely have a gym membership.  Their car will be conservative, and their home will be tasteful.


 Don't mistake them for unfriendly, rather they tend to stay to themselves.  Highly intelligent, and observers by nature, they often know more then they tell.




Terrier owners appreciate traditional style in dress and home furnishings.  They are non-pretentious, practical and responsible.


Financially secure, they have a plump stock portfolio and always know a good financial planner. 


You will find bourbon or scotch in their liquor cabinet, and left-over pork chops on the refrigerator shelf.  There is a conservative-colored sedan parked inside their garage.


Typically republicans--out of the breeds we profiled today, terrier owners are the most likely to be politicians.


They tend to be older, and well-established.  They have a bookshelf of classic literature, like to read and value education.




You will find them in front of the fireplace when not working.





Chihuahua owners

Most likely to flip you the bird:  Chihuahua owners have an appreciation for mischief.


They are trendy, but not overly concerned with the opinion of others.  Fussy in nature.  And, sometimes they forget to consider others when making decisions.


Stylistically they are flashy; unafraid of color.  From their clothes to their home they make a splash.  Think pimped-out autos, musical horns and bouncing cars with shiny chrome.

Chihuahua owners are not the affectionate sort generally, but are loyal to their family.


They carry the latest telephone in their favorite color--often rhinestone bejeweled.  These are the owners most likely to clothe their dog.




People with great appreciation for strength and majesty.  Generous with their heart and their wallet, and a generous sense of humor to match. 


They enjoy attention, and think outside the box.  Unafraid of a challenge.


While they are responsible by nature, they are not concerned with convention.  Many have a rebellious spirit.


Unconcerned with trends, they know what they like.  Don't expect them to follow the latest fashion, or drive a brand new vehicle. 


Frequently they are horse lovers too.  And even if they are not athletic, they certainly have an appreciation for nature.


Evenings will find them lounging on the couch, watching their favorite TV shows.


Generally they drive an older, SUV-related vehicle, chosen not for looks, but rather a capacity for practical usage.


They live larger than life, and believe in following dreams.  Commitment does not scare them, and often they are the marrying type.  Loyal by nature.

These are people who value experiences over material possessions.

 

Want to reprint this article?   

Be our guest as long as you include this complete blurb with it:

This article was originally featured on RioDancesOnTheSand.com, a blog for the thinking person... Written by Rio Denali, a 30-something with peculiar curiosities, who makes the observations that many of us avoid. Full of useful links and entertaining articles, it is a fun favorite for the intelligent reader. For more great articles like this, please visit RioDancesOnTheSand.com.